My sister Becca was really upset that when we came home from the hospital with Nathan's stuff that we didn't have a real box. It really bothered her. She talked to her boyfriend's mom who is a labor and delivery nurse at UCI and she told Becca that there just aren't enough donations and that usually the nurses are the ones buying the boxes.
I went over my mom's house one Saturday morning to find white box lids with ribbon, fabric, buttons, and butterflies all over the house. On the kitchen table and counters. On the couches in the living room. All over Becca's bedroom. I was like "what the heck kind of craft project did my sister start?" They were boxes. She went to Michael's craft store and spent about $200 of her own money to buy photo boxes to decorate and then donate to hospitals. That was how she was dealing with her grief. By helping other people. Such a more productive way that the ignoring-it-until-I-break-down-crying way of dealing that I was doing. So soon after I started helping them with the boxes. It really was a nice way to remember Nathan without having to completely sad since we were making something beautiful and it would help someone out who was going through what I had.
Becca also found an organization called OC Walk to Remember that runs a 5K walk to "walk for the steps our babies will never take." They help those that are dealing with pregnancy or infant loss by providing information, support groups, photo printers for hospitals, etc. So my entire family (minus Brent since he's out of state) is going to be walking. When Becca told me about it, I thought, hey I could do that. That would be a good experience. Now after registering today and looking at their website, I've broken down all over again. Maybe it's a little too soon. A little too fresh to be doing something like that and walking in Nathan's memory. He's just become a memory.
